Christmas 2008 – Evan’s Take

So Christmas is upon us.  For the past month or so, everyday when I would come home from work and just moan about how much I was looking forward to Christmas break.  It has come.  In fact, we are a week into it.  I was looking forward to this time because I have a lot that I want to work on; so much I want to accomplish.  Now, after one week I can proudly say that I haven’t really accomplished a single thing.

Breaks/vacations have never been a great thing for me.  I always want to accomplish much, but never do.  So far this one has been the same.  And so, by the end of it, when I am forced to return to work, I feel as though I have wasted whatever time I had.  Tomorrow is Christmas Eve so no work will be done there.  We’ll see how the remainder of break goes.

Tomorrow we will be trying real hard to do festive things.  In the past, Christmas hasn’t held me “joy” or festiveness for us.  For me, it always seems like I screw up Jess’ gift.  Let’s recap:

1. Christmas 2004: Jess and I had only been dating for about a month so no presents here.  However, after her telling me that she did not want to date me anymore around Christmas and then a week later having me up to her parents house for New Years and re-asking me out, it was definitely and interesting season.
2. Christmas 2005: By this time, Jess and I were engaged by about three months.  We knew each other pretty well.  Or, at least I thought.  She bought me a fantastic Japan poster she found on eBay but then tracked down on Craigslist to have it in time and also the book, “Rules and Exercises for Holy Dying” by Jeremy Taylor, which is the companion to, “Rules and Exercises for Holy Living”.  I had read “Holy Living” for a paper and just loved it.  She couldn’t find it in time though.  Still, the one she did get me was fantastic too.  You know what I got her?  I spent like 30 hours carefully crafting a handmade book of all my poetry.  Sound good right?  Not so much.  What I realized later, after it didn’t go off too well, was that the poetry book wasn’t about her.  It was about me.  Plus, I spent the last three days right before Christmas that year locked in a room putting it together.  In the end, she would have liked having me for that time instead of a book about me.  However, she has expressed an appreciation for it since.
3. Christmas 2006:  This was our first Christmas married and in our own apartment and Jess was pretty pregnant.  To make it extra special, I suggested (kind of off the cuff) that we do “Twelve Days of Christmas” where each day we give each other something to do with the song.  The first day went great, I gave her a t-shirt with an original piece of my graphic artwork that said, “An apart bridge and a pair of trees” (say it outloud if you can’t catch the correlation).  However, after that it just went downhill.  So far downhill, I can’t really remember the other things I got her.  Yet, we have a good laugh now about it.  Good times.
4. Christmas 2007: This was last year and our first Christmas with Jeremiah.  We were living with her parents at the time and really had no idea where we would be six months later (here in Indonesia).  I think at this time we were still really vying to get hired on at Morrison Academy in Taiwan.  I had just finished my last practicum, where I was commuting everyday 65 miles from Troutdale to Gervais, OR.  Though I may have gotten her other things, the thing that stands out the most was a really high quality paper cutter from Craft Warehouse.  She had asked specifically for craft things, so I got her that and some various other scrapbooking supplies.  However, my father sent her an even cooler gift.  He got her a huge box full of craft supplies: paper, stamps, etc.  What’s terrible though, is that we weren’t able to bring either with us to Indonesia.  The paper cutter was like a million pounds heavy and while she did bring some of the stamps and stuff from my dad, the bulk of it stayed at home.  My dad bought me a Magellan GPS unit that at first we didn’t really think we needed, but after using her (yes her, we called her Maggie) for a couple of weeks we just fell in love.  She has since been given to Jess’ mom.  In fact, we loved her so much that we picked up an earlier model for her dad, too; on Craigslist.  On a side note, Silas was conceived sometime this season, so it wasn’t all bad.
5. Christmas 2008:  This is our first year in Indonesia, our first year with Silas, our second year with Jeremiah, and our fourth year together.  And you know what?  I still don’t know what to get her.  Pretty sad, being that Christmas is the day after tomorrow.  Now given, the pickens are pretty slim here, but I wish I could still find her that one thing that would just blow her away.  She bought me a guitar that I picked out, paid for, and have been using for two weeks.  That, and I am getting that $6,000 worth of computers from HP the day after Friday.  Her parents bought me the movie “Hancock” and the fantastic TV series “The Big Bang Theory”, Season One (sorry Mom & Dad, she made me open it).  My dad, whose package should arrive next week sometime, will most likely have some pretty cool kit in it, as he’s been hinting pretty heavily.  But what about for Jess? I am sitting here basking in the coolness of technology and sitcoms while the most I can offer her is a few hours by herself to go shopping at the one department store in this town that breeds more frustration then savings.  What to do!!!

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve.  We’re going to make a great roast dinner.  At least I hope it is great.  I’ve never roasted a Chicken before.  Without tring to sound like a stereotypical worldly Christian, who writes a whole post on presents and then throws a little Jesus into it to make it religous, I am really hoping that in these last few days I I might be able to bring into our household some of the true Spirit of Christmas.

Help us Lord, to not focus on the meaninglessness of this season but to instead, focus on you.  Help us to see Your face at this time.  Help us to remember You, to honor You, to glorify You.  And help us to live lives that please You, Lord, not ourselves.  Amen

Related posts:

1. 25 Random Things About Evan
2. Christmas in July…at least that’s what it felt like
3. Inducing Labor Day
4. Monkey School
5. A Social Network Christmas