This post is part of an occasional series where we Take a Trip Back in Time to relate stories and experiences that happened long before this site existed.
Despite what you may have read elsewhere, I did not have unattractive hair when I met my wife. My hair was (manly) beautiful. Her hair, well, that’s a story for another occasion. I had just fulfilled my enlistment with the US Navy and was on a quest to grow my hair out to a nice, Eugene-worthy-hippy length. By the time we met in the autumn of 2004, I was well on my way to achieving some nice, long locks. Though she’d never admit it, I think she secretly found my hair quite attractive. Perhaps that’s why she said “yes!” when I asked her out on our first date.
Asking Jessica to coffee was probably the best thing I had ever done up to that point. [1. Except for the obvious: entering into a relationship with Jesus Christ, of course.] Not only did the story end (begin?) with us getting married and having two wonderful children,[2. So far...] the friendship we have surpasses all others.
On to the Story
I pulled up to Jess’ dorm just as the setting sun’s fading rays reflected on the hood of my ’91 Honda Civic. I was unusually nervous that night. While I’m a pretty proud, cocky guy that (in my opinion) handles himself fairly well in social situations, there was something about this particular girl that made my heart pound a little bit harder than normal. I opened the car door for her and our life together began.
Neither of us drank coffee back then, but we didn’t know that when we made the date earlier that day, so we drove to the Gov Cup; a hip, low lit storefront cafe in the heart of downtown Salem, just within the shadow of Willamette University. The cafe’s ambiance was perfect for our first date and it would become one of our favorite places to frequent.
We both ordered hot chocolates and quickly found a small table, set up against the wall on the second floor. Then we talked.
There were a couple of rubber bands on the table for some reason which ended up in both of our hands, being twirled around our fingers nervously. This wasn’t a coordinated effort or anything, just something that happened. We talked about many things: my service in the Navy, her hope to be a missionary, my wanting to be a traveling hobo, and both of our desires to not have a romantic relationship at the time.
Jess tells me that it was my honesty that attracted her that night in the first place. I was upfront about a past that I was not proud of. Yet, she did not turn and run. Her understanding spirit wouldn’t allow her to. It was this understanding that she had that drew my interest in her and has sustained my love for her these several years.
On the car ride home we didn’t make another date. She did however invite me to church with her, as I was new to town and hadn’t figured out where to worship yet. The night ended simply. We didn’t hold hands or share a goodnight kiss; we just said goodbye.
In our next post as part of our Trip Back series, we have our first DTR – despite the fact that there wasn’t supposed to be a relationship to define.
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